15 September 2005


Comedy is such a great thing. Really, the only thing that makes any of the unfortunate world events bearable for the human psyche. Thanks to Bill Maher for this golden nugget...

And finally, New Rule: America must recall the
president. That's what this country needs. A good, old-fashioned,
California-style recall election! Complete with Gary Coleman, porno
actresses and action film stars. And just like Schwarzenegger's
predecessor here in california, George Bush is now so unpopular,
he must defend his job against...Russell Crowe.
Because at this point, I want a leader who will throw a phone at
somebody. In fact, let's have only phone throwers. Naomi Campbell can be
the vice-president!

Now, I kid, but seriously, Mr. President, this job can't be fun for you
anymore. There's no more money to spend. You used up all of that. You
can't start another war because you also used up the army. And now, darn
the luck, the rest of your term has become the Bush family nightmare:
helping poor people.

Yeah, listen to your mom. The cupboard's bare, the credit card's maxed
out, and no one is speaking to you: mission accomplished! Now it's time
to do what you've always done best: lose interest and walk away. Like
you did with your military service. And the oil company. And the
baseball team. It's time. Time to move on and try the next fantasy job.
How about cowboy
or spaceman?!

Now, I know what you're saying. You're saying that there's so many
other things that you, as president, could involve yourself in...Please
don't. I know, I know, there's a lot left to do. There's a war with
Venezuela, and eliminating the sales tax on yachts. Turning the space
program over to the church. And
Social Security to Fannie Mae. Giving embryos the vote.

But, sir, none of that is going to happen now.
Why? Because you govern like Billy Joel drives. You've performed so
poorly I'm surprised you haven't given yourself a medal. You're a
catastrophe that walks like a man.

Herbert Hoover was a shitty president, but even he never conceded an
entire metropolis to rising water and snakes.

On your watch, we've lost almost all of our allies, the surplus, four
airliners, two Trade Centers, a piece of the Pentagon and the City of
New Orleans...Maybe you're just not lucky!

I'm not saying you don't love this country. I'm just wondering how much
worse it could be if you were on the other side. So, yes, God does speak
to you, and what he's saying is, "Take a hint."



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